It was Friday afternoon and my heart sang. I have prepared what to wear since days ago and discuss about it weeks. And no, it isn’t a date. Well, it kind of is, it is with my dearest besties. We knew each other 15 years by January 2023, we went through a lot individually and as besties and am sure Fanny and Lucky agree with me that we are lucky to meet in the company we work for then. A date with them are precious event that we discussed and prepared days or sometime even weeks before, we want to make it special – always.
This article is about the friendship that we have, how we built it, leverage it and keep it going. To me this writing is an ode, a love letter and gratitude for a 15 years of friendship that help make me a better person everyday. I hope this also article will help all the ladies (and men) out there to identify besties to keep (and built), to appreciate the friendship they have, to give them some ideas on how to leverage and keep it going. Most importantly to me I want to share about the beauty and the joy of friendship that can inject smiles even in the bleakest days, save my life (literally), make me a smarter and more beautiful woman.
We couldn’t be more different as an individual. Fanny is a kinesthetic, deeply knowledgeable about beauty and health, lead clean living nearly rigidly, never fail to take regular holiday with her family as part of well-being regime and extremely smart. Lucky is as impulsive as one can be, well networked with fountain of knowledge about so many things, outgoing and has golden heart ready to help anyone. Me ? I am as far away from impulsive, hoarder (I like to call myself collector actually to cover my real condition) of many things, as geek as one can be and love my country to death. Both Lucky and I are as far away from healthy clean living as possible, we both are devout foodies and life of leisure. While we are different in many ways, we are similar in our values to be ethical, drive to be successful and extremely professional in what we do at work. It is our similarity that brought us together when we were finance managers. We are also similar in our passion and deep love to our families.
Choosing besties most of the time is like destiny, you just happen to meet people you genuinely care, care about you and somewhat have similarity to allow us to enjoy shared activities. Caring get tested all the time, to know the professional and ethical boundary at work and yet still able to care about each other, especially if you happen to know them at work. It never is hard work for us on this space, we prize our professionalism and our reputation very highly so at instinctive level we know what to do. Similarity is something we stumble upon but as we share, we grow to like similar things more. Lucky was our K Drama jedi while Fanny and me are more of Western quality movies and series, pandemic brought us to try Lucky’s love and we have never turn back since. We all love fashion just like any woman, we shared our loves for example our love for all Tulisan bags and Fanny and Lucky love for Button Scarves modest products, we introduce each other things that we grow to love together.
At work, we prize our professionalism terribly much, we fight with our sharpest claws to get the best out of what we do, we always endeavor to give more than what is expected out of us and go for record breaking achievements. We leveraged each other to get the best out of the three of us, we each have our own strengths and area of development and our relationship enable the highest synergy that our company benefit greatly. We are very disciplined in maintaining our boundary throughout our 15 years friendship professionally, we pushed, pushed back and remind each other of our boundaries and our professional credo.
Fanny never shied away from telling me off when I made mistake at work or intervene when help is needed. Lucky rolled up her sleeve when I struggle with commercial endeavor. I help Lucky and Fanny for their area for development. We learned from each other diligently, Lucky is our tax Jedi, Fanny is very strong in accounting and finance while I am more of commercial person, we grew professionally through deep sharing of our knowledge, pull our network to get the insight and reach we need to grow our business. It is not understatement we give north of millions of dollars gain over years through our professional growth as we grow to become senior leaders there together, in a way it is a gratitude to the company we work for to bring us together (and now allow us to grow professionally and individually outside for me and Lucky).
Outside work, we equally help each other in our lives. As I and Lucky are not the most devoted into our own health, Fanny helped to remind me (in her way that we call her our ‘drill master’) to live healthily, she is with me all the way when I struggle to lose 20+ kg ), she lost sleep over my business travel knowing am not great with my blood pressure. Lucky helped me when I lost my mind during my late father Covid 19 days. We shared tips on fashions, beauty, parenting and investments that help us to grow as better individuals. We intervened when we should to help with each other, we accepted these interventions as blessings.
We tolerated each other foibles and laughed, that is perhaps why despite our strong personalities and quirkiness, our friendship / sisterhood survive and thrive. I and Lucky chuckled when during our holiday trip, on our hiking leg, Fanny left us behind, Lucky and Fanny endured me when I was glued to my mobile during our outing as work crisis arose or I and Fanny sighed in understanding as Lucky was on her impulse streak not able to deliver something to us. We did not shy away from giving inputs and feedbacks although sometime cringe at the raw unfiltered feedbacks, but we know it is always from the heart.
We grew to love each other through our foibles. It takes a lot of compromise but we grew to leverage our quirks and foibles and passions and hobbies. I love food so Lucky and Fanny let me decide where and what as long as it is Japanese / Korean dishes – and I took them through all kind of experiment with new places. Fanny has complex schedule when it comes to our dates and girl holidays, we work around her schedule but in turn she arranged our holiday to greatest satisfaction (and bone breaking walks). We sighed through her ambition to take us to Peru (which will involve massive walk in my and Lucky definition).
At this junction, our friendship transcended the word of friendship and become a sisterhood, an extended family. Lucky helped me take care of my father and mother’s issue, we rally and help each others at personal level. We want this friendship-turned-sisterhood to last a lifetime and thus we are conscious it needs work from all of us and we are willing to work on it. There are still our respective ambitions and dreams for ourselves and our families, that with help each other, we will be closer to make them happen and together we shall. Some friendship / sisterhood can be toxic and so I hope this story can help refresh on the meaning of constructive, joyful and beautiful friendship worth keeping a lifetime.